Every mom’s biggest fear is that they’re not doing the job well enough, and that they are not providing their children with everything they need. However, this is a fear that is unfounded. Every child will require a different parenting approach and there are going to be frequent ups and downs. Parenting unfortunately does not come with a manual and it will be learning process for the rest of your life. However, there are some tips you can use to help you feel more confident in your ability to be a great mom.

1. Fit Your Child into Your Life

Your job as a mom does not mean that you have to give up everything else you enjoy about life. It is your responsibility to fit your child in around your own dreams and ambitions rather than give way to theirs. Although it may be hard, try to regularly make time for yourself and the things you enjoy, even if this is as simple as curling up on the sofa and reading a good book. You might not be able to do these things as much as you did before you had your child, however keeping in touch with your interests will make you a much more objective and well-rounded parent.

2. Don’t Strive for Perfection

When thinking about how to be a good mom, this tip really is the key. Don’t strive for perfection because it’s something that doesn’t exist. Life is unpredictable, it’s messy and just when you think you’re on the right road you have to a swinging U-Turn and find the right way again. The trick is to learn how to deal with these uncertainties. Embrace the mistakes and learn from them instead of beating yourself up and thinking that you’re not good enough.

3. Listen to Your Children

With so much technology around in this day and age it sometimes feels difficult to properly communicate with our children. But this is exactly what you need to do. Instead of just plopping them in front of the TV sit down with them and talk about the show they’re watching. Let them ask you questions and try to give them as in depth answers as you can. Let them tell you that story they’ve told you 5 times already this week. The social communication ability your child has will inevitably stem from you, so make sure you give them a good foundation to work from.

4. Separate Friendship from Parenting

As children reach adulthood it’s not uncommon for them to become friends with their parents, and this is a lovely thing to happen. However, this friendship has no place during childhood. The familial system has changed a lot over the last couple of decades and children have more say and more responsibility over their life than ever before. This is good, because it does provide them with important skills for adulthood. However, there needs to be limits and these must be set and enforced by you.